Another Day, Another Reason to Panic (37 weeks, 4 days)

It seems like every day some one new is asking me how I'm feeling or commenting that I look like I'm about to pop or that it looks like the baby has dropped. I honestly appreciate the concern and interest, especially from friends, but after today I just feel kind of...done. I don't know how else to describe the way I'm feeling. I went into this birth knowing (I thought) exactly what I wanted. I just assumed Connor would come early, like Zooey. Last time at 37 weeks, 4 days I'd had a newborn for two full weeks. Now? I have two swollen feet, a belly that knocks everything over, stretch marks, pains when I walk or try to roll over, and fears about my choices that just won't quit. I made the mistake of watching The Business of Giving Birth when I ran across the documentary on Netflix.  I made a decision long ago that, yes, I did want to induce labor at 39 weeks, thank you very much.  Granted, I didn't think this was really something I'd have to think about.  One early baby means two early babies, right?

Turns out that isn't entirely true.  Now I'm faced with a big decision, one I didn't think I would have any trouble with.  To induce or not to induce?  I understand that little man needs all the time he can get to cook completely but I'm ready now.  How much should that factor into my decision?  (According to the article I just read, it shouldn't at all.  Being "over it" is not a good reason for induction.)  My dad is flying into town at the end of the week and I would love for him to be able to spend a few days with Connor.  I don't want to have to wait another year (or however long, I don't know) for him to be able to visit again.  I was literally in tears over this, watching the documentary and feeling like I was being slapped in the face for wanting these things.  I don't want the "joy" of natural birth like a lot of women do; I don't feel that I'm being cheated out of a life altering experience.  I just want my healthy baby, and no Ricki Lake, I don't care exactly how he makes it into my arms.  I don't feel that I need the experience of reaching down and pulling the baby out myself.  (That's not what this is about at all, I just wanted to punch Ricki in the face for daring to assume that all women are being cheated out of a "real birth".)

Okay, let's go on to the weekly update before I start the waterworks again.  Zooey looks at me funny when I cry, anyway.  :)

Waiting & Waiting (36 weeks, 5 days)

I got a little lax with my posting there for a bit, but that just gives me more to talk about!  Daniel has been gone for the past week (coming home tomorrow!) so its been a bit of a whirlwind.  Proud of myself for only having one emotional breakdown in his absence.

At my appointment last week,  they decided to go ahead and starting checking my cervix.  I was dilated to 3 centimeters!  Hooray!  I had high hopes for this being the start of some serious progress!  Went to my appointment today, hoping to be a few more centimeters dilated though I've been hearing from lots of people that I could be stuck at 3 for a good, long while.  Sure enough...  Doctor said it feels about the same and his head is pointing down.  Made a joke about how most of the women I know who had boys went way past their due dates (like, 42 weeks).  Warren said we definitely wouldn't wait that long and could start talking about induction at 39 weeks if little man is still hanging in there.  Apparently my cervix is "favorable".  I tried reading up on this and the whole business with finding my Bishop's Score was a little confusing.  I trust my doctors and if they think its a good idea to talk about induction, then that's the direction we'll go.  Of course I'll be asking a billion questions!

All righty!  Time for the weekly nonsense!  

The Week My Ankles Disappeared (35 weeks, 4 days)

How far along?
35 weeks and 4 days!  At this point he's been in my belly just as long Zooey was.  Today has been weirdly emotional for me and I'm not sure why.  Been secretly wishing I would go into labor today so I would have a funny "yes I went into labor ON Labor Day" story.  Ah, well.
Maternity clothes?
Mostly rocking the undies and old tees around the house.  I'm lazy.
Stretch marks?
None yet, but my skin didn't have to stretch for any longer than this last time...  Back into the unknown!
Sleep?
Still loving waking up in a pool of sweat.  Moving in the middle of the night is really painful.
Food cravings:
FOREVER PIZZA AND ROOT BEER!  And sweets.
Belly button in or out?
No change from last week.
Movement?
Lots of hiccups or spasms or something. 
What I miss?
My feet not feeling sloshy and swollen.  Being able to sit in a slightly reclined position and still being able to breathe.
What I’m looking forward to: 
HAVING THIS BABY!
Milestones:
Nails growing, packing on fat; about 5 1/2 pounds and over 18 inches long.
What baby looks like this week:

35 Weeks Pregnant

The Week I Lost My Mind (34 weeks, 4 days)

Being pregnant makes me insane.  I'm not just talking "oh, I cried at that cute baby commercial " or "that sweet song about kids gave me the weepies".  I'm talking full on panic attacks over next to nothing.  My first was over not being able to pick a name.  I literally sat down in the kitchen floor, in front of the refrigerator, and absolutely flipped my lid over not being able to decide on a name.  I was sure I would never find a name I love enough.  (I did, obviously, but at the time it wasn't something I thought could ever happen.)  After that episode I was okay for the most part- weepy but fine.  Then I woke up this Saturday and I guess I decided it would be a good day to just freak out a little.  I got up to use the restroom which apparently woke Zooey up.  I went back to bed and hoped she would do the same.  NOPE.  She started screaming and crying because no one was coming to let her out of baby jail.  At this point it's probably 7:30; I am so not ready to be up and about.  I had gone to sleep with a headache and was still feeling pretty sick.  So I did the only thing that made sense at the time...I started to cry.  Not just some tears and sniffles. serious choking sobs.  I just wasn't ready to get up.  I felt awful and was just so, so tired.  I eventually woke Daniel up then got myself up to start the day.  That was when I got a nosebleed.  My day really just didn't start well.

Good news!  I was able to make it to my second baby shower without having given birth a few days before!  The decorations were adorable and the food was delicious!  The best part?  I didn't have to do anything but show up!  It felt so nice to know I wasn't responsible for balloons or cupcakes or invitations.  So thankful for my totally awesome aunt who put it all together!

Connor is giving me some pretty intense kicks.  I think that means he's ready for me to talk about him for a bit.

So, are these contractions or...? (33 weeks & 4 days)

Wow, these past weeks have felt kind of crazy!  Between the sleeping and the more sleeping and the eating everything in sight...  ;)  The new crib is here and set up (again, not sure why I insisted on doing this alone), there are sheets on the mattress, and we're just waiting to put a sweet stuffed animal in there to make it look more inviting!  ...Not that it particularly matters since he'll be in a bassinet in our room for the first month (or three).  Now I get to tackle the big project I somehow tricked myself into thinking was a good idea: recovering the glider!  I finished the foot rest but the rest of the cushion is still sitting there, staring at me, telling me to buy more fabric so I can finish.  Hush chair, no one asked you!

I also go to enjoy my first baby shower this past Saturday!  My sweet, sweet friends put together a Girls' Night Out at one of my favorite restaurants, The Cazbah.  Needless to say we laughed lots, ate way too much, and generally had a grand time!  Connor got lots of adorable outfits and super fun necessities.  Can't wait to put them all to use!

32 Weeks- Remember what peaceful sleep was like?

To be fair, I had spent the week taking care of a sick baby and then a sick husband.

I had a pretty solid first trimester.  No sickness or nausea and never so tired that I couldn't function.  Not so in this last trimester!  Mid afternoon naps have become pretty much mandatory if I want to get anything done during the last half of the day!  I'm ready to be done with this pregnancy!  Not only am I ready to meet this little man, but I'm excited about being able to roll over during the night without being in pain and to sleep on my tummy again!

31 weeks, 4 days- Can I just have this baby already?

Why are our weekends always so busy?  Daniel took Friday off because we thought we would be leaving for Atlanta that evening.  That trip ended up getting cancelled but we still had to take Z to get caught up on her shots.  Poor baby.  Nothing is more heartbreaking than your baby looking at you, crying, grapes hanging out of her mouth like she's thinking "mom, why do you keep letting them do this to me?" and you can't even explain to her why it's happening.  Six shots.  Six.  Bad mommy status right there.  I have never heard a more pitiful cry come from that little girl.  Unfortunately, Daddy had to do the dirty job of holding her while she got poked with needles so she climbed right into mommy's lap to snuggle when it was all over.  She was a big, brave girl though and only cried for a few minutes.  After a good ol' nap and her very own ice cream cone, she was back to 100%.  (There was even a big dog at Bruster's!  The couple was nice enough to let Zooey pet him.  He gave her a big doggy kiss, which I think she liked just as much as the ice cream.)

"Chocolate with sprinkles!  Yessss!"

Saturday was our super awesome date night (described below as my best moment this week).  Then came Sunday...  Oh, man Sunday.  We were extremely tired from getting in late the night before (party animals) and it was so hard to stay awake during church.  I was so looking forward to going home and crawling under the covers for a nice long nap while Daniel finished up some school work.  Somehow, halfway home, we decided it would be a good afternoon to drive to the lake.  I agreed, thinking we could go after nap time because hey!  We live, like, 20 minutes from a pretty decent lake.  Little did I know that my husband actually meant Lake Joccassee.  Ooops!  We called some friends, went home to gather our things, grabbed lunch and were on our way.  Zooey did end up napping in the car, which was nice, but we also almost blew our car up following a detour.  There was smoke and I was very nervous/crabby for the rest of the drive.

Pre nap sass

Those of you that know me well know I'm not an outdoorsy kind of person.  I don't like feeling the squishy lake bottom between my toes.  I don't like leaving my backpack of stuff sitting more than an arm's reach away from me.  I most certainly don't like cold water!  Luckily, the lake provided all of these things!  Sweet!  Pregnant me and the lake super duper did not mix.  Zooey loved it, though, and that's all that really matters.  She loved having daddy carry her out into the deeper water and playing with the sand where it was shallow.  There were even a few doggies for her to check out!  When we stopped for gas on our way home, Daniel went in to buy me a snack.  The convenience store was sadly out of Moon Pies but he did bring me a Yoohoo! and a Blueberry Ugly for us to split.  My husband is seriously awesome- he knows just how to cheer a girl up!

Okay, enough rambling.  Sorry about that y'all!  On to this week's update!

Playing Around With Photoshop

Tried playing around with CS2 today and made some social media buttons. I've never used photo editing software before so I'm really just winging it at this point! The button colors look a little off to me, and the Instagram badge looks slightly smaller. Or maybe I'm just looking too hard/tired at staring at the computer screen. If anyone has any tips they'd like to share, feel free to drop 'em in the comments!

30 Weeks- Now I begin the real countdown!

We've actually had a very productive week!  We bought and assembled Connor's crib which puts us about a billion steps ahead of where we were when Zooey was born.  (We didn't expect her for another month so her crib was still hanging out in its box. Ooops!)  We actually moved Zooey to the new crib and Connor will take over her old one.  Today is her first day napping in it and it isn't going well so far.  Granted she's completely off her schedule; I think that has more to do with it than the fact she's in a new bed.

This morning I got a call from a nurse with my insurance.  It was...strange but appreciated.  However, it gave me a few more things to worry about.  "I see you delivered your first early.  What happened there?"  I told her what happened- I woke up, water broke, delivered Z within a few hours- and she seemed satisfied with that.  "Well, boys don't have as good of a chance when they're born as early as she was."  Excuse me?  This was followed by a string of questions.  "Have you been seen by the high risk doctors?"  "Have they been using a probe to check your cervix?"  "Have they given you any medication to mature his lungs more quickly?"  My doctors haven't mentioned any of those things.  When I asked them at my last appointment if I should be concerned about this baby coming early they just kind of shrugged and said "we'll monitor you as you get closer".  I know she wasn't trying to scare me.  She was just doing her job, letting me know what I may need as this pregnancy progresses.  In one phone call she was more helpful to me than all the doctors in all my visits combined.

Weekly update time?  WEEKLY UPDATE TIME!

Big Sister

 Just to be clear, we definitely don't hate babies in this house.  I actually do encourage Zooey to kiss and pat my belly and tell her all about her baby brother.  She's heard his heart beat and has been tirelessly practicing gentle touches.  I'm pretty sure she's excited to be a big sister (for now, anyway).  Hopefully this will at least make you laugh or make your Monday a bit more bearable.  "If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane."  (Daniel will roll his eyes at the Jimmy Buffet reference when he reads this.  Doesn't help that she's actually wearing a Margaritaville t-shirt in the picture.  Thanks, Dad!)

Enjoy more pictures of the sweetest big sis after the cut.  :)

29 Weeks- And the Madness Continues!

I went for my next-to-last 3 week check up yesterday.  It ended up being the most interesting visit to date.  Not only did I forget to leave a urine sample, but just before the nurse hooked me up to check my blood pressure my nose started gushing blood.  Okay, maybe gushing is a bit exaggerated but "steady flow" is too menstrual.  Either way it was creepy and gross and would have made Creepy-chan totally jealous.  (ANTM reference.  You're welcome.)  To summarize: everything looks great, measuring right on time, passed my sugar test and doctors still shrug their shoulders and say "pregnancy" when you ask about back pains that keep you curled up in bed.

28 Weeks, 1 Day- Beginning the Third Trimester!

Its been another rough week, physically.  This whole combo of having a toddler and being pregnant is just not working for me right now.  My temper is really short and that isn't helped by being in pain about 95% of the time.  I simultaneously want to spend all my time with my friends and hide under my bed until this baby decided to come.  I'm really hoping he come early like Zooey did; I already feel like he's trying to crack my pelvic area in half and bust out!  I'm definitely going to have lots of questions for the poor doctor when I go back on Wednesday!

Big News, Guys!

We started the journey of naming our little boy with no clear direction.  Should we include family names or be strictly against them like we were with Zooey?  Should we try to pick something that has a similar meaning or origin as Zooey?  We still had Oliver Patrick left over from when weren't sure if Z was a boy or girl, but we quickly ruled that out.

We eventually decided on a middle name: Lee.  It's a family name on Daniel's side.  It looks like we'll be the only ones producing a male man-cub any time soon so we decided it was worth breaking our previous rule about family names.  (It means a lot to Daniel, too; its a sweet reminder of his dad.)  Then began the arduous task of choosing a name to pair with it.  Lee is pretty basic so there were still lots of options available.  For some reason my first three picks all began with G (Grayson, Gabriel, Gavin).  Weird.  Then Lucas Lee was jokingly tossed around over lunch at Olive Garden.  Finally Connor joined the group, completely out of nowhere.  (There's Connor Shaw, obviously, but I would never think to name my child after an athlete.)

We finally narrowed it down to two and over the weekend, a victor emerged...

When Pregnant Crazy Takes Over

I started this post sometime last week.  Thought I would continue/finish since most of these feelings seem to still be relevant.  I never meant for this to be a mommy-to-be centered blog but that's where I'm at right now.  That's what I'm dealing with.  Maybe soon I can bake or craft something worth posting about.  Until then, enjoy me either whining like an angsty 14 year old or delighting in the fact that I'll be a mom again.

27 Weeks, 1 Day

Hey there!  Hope everyone had an awesome 4th of July!  We had random down-pours all day long, so we didn't really get the opportunity to blow anything up.  We made up for it by eating twice as much, I think.  My crazy, pregnant self decided we needed pumpkin pie to celebrate America's birthday.  Shh, it was delicious!  We were bad parents and didn't take any pictures of our little one decked out in her red, white, & blue outfit.  We were kind of busy half napping on the couch.  Ooops...  So instead, we'll just throw it back and enjoy a picture of Zooey from Freedom Day 2012.

Look at all that precious fat!  I miss those big, hammy legs!

26 Weeks

I actually forgot today marked twenty six weeks of this crazy kid kicking around in my belly.  Then my Pregnancy Center app alerted me then I got my Baby Center e-mail.  Lots of fun things happening and developing this week!  Even though this has been a rough one its still nice to read about how Little Man is changing.

Catch Up!

In a(nother) desperate attempt to keep myself coming back to this blog on a semi-regular basis, I figured I would start updating my weekly pregnancy progress.  I'll be starting a lot later than I did with Zooey but I'd rather start later than not at all!  Enjoy reading about my food cravings and expanding belly for at least the next ten weeks!  (Suckers.)

Confession Time

I took a lot of time thinking of how to approach what I'm about to write.  I posted (pretty vaguely) about it on Facebook and didn't really like the response to the issue.  Despite that, I've decided to take a few minutes here and flesh out what I was really trying to convey in that desperate, sleep-deprived Facebook status.

I Mean Well, Really

I always start blogging with the intention of actually keeping up with events in my life.  I hate looking back on months past and realizing I don't remember half of the things that happened!  I need to be better about documenting my daughter's sweet smiles, my husband's goofy faces and the feeling of our future child swimming around in my belly.  I think everyone knows by now, but in case you somehow missed the announcement...

Yes, we are pregnant again!

We found out on Super Bowl Sunday, the weekend before Zooey's birthday party.  Needless to say it was a hectic week and we had a really hard time keeping that particular secret.  I've used two methods of gender prediction recently and both have ended up predicting another baby girl in our future.  The "ring on a string" test was accurate for Zooey  so we'll see how this turns out!

Hiatus Over!

Hey guys, I'm back!  Our family suffered the stomach bug that's been going around last week and I think I'm finally rested enough to get back to this blog.  Be back soon with fun and fabulous updates.

Foodie Baby

I'm a picky eater.  There are a ton of things I won't touch and can't even stand the smell of.  Most of them are totally normal things that people love.  Hot dogs, tomatoes, lettuce, mayo, green beans..  That said, I don't want Zooey to grow up not being introduced to new tastes and textures but how do I accomplish this when I don't even want to eat a lot of foods myself?

Frustrations and Sleepy Babies

As I sit here listening to my daughter scream in her crib, once again resisting her nap, I can't help but think back on the days when she would sleep all day.  Literally all I had to do was put her down on something soft and she'd be out like a light.  No, seriously.  Of course I'm happy that she's healthy and happy and mobile, even though she keeps me exhausted!

Our First Snow Day!

Today we got a very unexpected surprise- about 2 inches of snow!  Daniel and I were leaving Target when it started (I promptly refused to drive home-people get too crazy).  He was eager to get home so we could wake Zooey up, bundle her up, and take her out into all the crazy wet mess.  Obviously I don't care that much about snow.  Its cold, gets in my hair and melts and makes it all frizzy.  I did go out long enough to make a tiny snowman for Zooey and get lots of pictures.  I don't know that she cared much about it (just like Mommy, good job girly) but we did get some precious shots.  Enjoy!

Strawberry Chocolate Decadence Pie

Happy (late) Valentine's Day, all!  Hope you were all able to spend the day with someone special, even if it was your cat.  I got to spend the day with my sweet princess making pie for our small group get together last night.  The pie involved strawberries which resulted in lots of begging and whining and general flailing until I decided to share.  Didn't know Zooey was so enthusiastic about that particular fruit.

I didn't do a great job documenting the pie making process, but its pretty self explanatory.  You should be able to do all right without a lot of visual aid.  To fulfill my goal of posting at least one recipe this month, I give you the Strawberry and Chocolate Decadence Pie!  (Used this recipe found on Pinterest.)

Busy Day

It's been interesting around my house today.  The little nugget decided she didn't want to take her nap today unless I was holding her.  (I figured this out after holding her on and off for an hour.  I would try to put her down, she would scream, I would hold her, etc, etc....)  Obviously, I haven't had time to do a whole lot.

What Time Is It?!

I've always been a huge nerd, and I tend to get a lot of laughs about it.  I guess that wasn't enough to keep my mild insanity out of my parenting (haha!).  I went to my first convention last summer (HeroesCon in Charlotte, NC) and opted to dress for comfort rather than come up with a "LOOK AT ME" outfit or even a geeky t-shirt.  I mean, you're basically walking around a confusing maze of vendor and artist tables and trying to decide which panels, if any, to rush to.  All of this with nary a bench to rest on.  But anyway.  Now that I have a baby, things have changed.  I have a tiny human that I can dress up with no complaint from them and babies are always guaranteed to gain a few "ooohs" and "ahhhs".  I gave Zooey's first con outfit a lot of consideration, and after a while settled on one.

Giving Blogging Another Go

Mommy and Zooey grins!

When I was pregnant with Zooey, I did my best to update my baby blog each week with wonderful details about my pregnancy. What I wanted to eat, who I wanted to punch, how much weight I'd gained... That obviously didn't work out that well. Most days I was too lazy tired to fill everyone in on all the details. Now that she's here not much has changed. Instead of being lazy and big on the couch playing video games, I'm chasing a (almost!) one year old around the house, trying to keep her from chewing on wires or the dogs. But hanging out with a group of ladies who are oh-so wonderful has inspired to begin my blogging adventure anew! Here I'll try to keep up with my crafts, recipes, and fun stories of life with my little princess (and the king, of course).  So bear with me as I try to figure all this mess out!